Premarital Counseling
We're Getting Married! How Do We Maintain A Healthy, Happy Relationship?
Congratulations, and I’m glad you are here! So often the focus is on creating a beautiful wedding day, when it is just as important to put effort into planning how to have a beautiful relationship through premarital counseling.
Many couples enter into marriage with high hopes and expectations, but the ups and downs of life create unexpected challenges. Our goal is to help you create a solid foundation by:
- improving communication
- understanding your cycle of conflict
- aligning expectations around family of origin, finances, beliefs, future goals
- creating comfort and confidence to address sex and intimacy
These important tools for a lasting marriage are covered in my program The Happy Couple Plan, which guides our work together and includes videos and exercise to enhance our work.
Why Do We Need Premarital Counseling At The Beginning Of Our Relationship?
Premarital counseling is becoming increasingly common as couples recognize the importance of investing in their relationship before saying “I do.” It’s a proactive step towards building a strong and fulfilling partnership.
By addressing potential issues upfront, couples can increase their chances of a happy and successful marriage. Many people assume therapy is for problems, but any couples therapist will tell you that we wish couples would come in sooner before there is disconnection and resentment. Premarital Counseling creates the groundwork for avoidance of problems by creating a shared understanding and plan for your life together.
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What Should We Expect In Premarital Counseling And Does It Really Help?
Premarital counseling typically involves a series of sessions with a trained therapist. Couples will discuss topics such as communication, intimacy, finances, family planning, and conflict resolution. The therapist will provide guidance and support, and some homework, to help develop strategies for building a strong relationship.
Research suggests that couples who participate in premarital counseling are more likely to experience higher levels of marital satisfaction and lower rates of divorce.
Numerous studies have shown the positive impact of premarital counseling on relationship outcomes. Couples who engage in premarital counseling often report improved communication, increased intimacy, and stronger problem-solving skills.
Let's Start Helping You Plan For Your Marriage Today!
Investing in your relationship before marriage is one of the best decisions you can make. Premarital counseling can help you build a strong foundation for a happy and lasting marriage. Don’t wait until problems arise to seek help. Contact us to get started, we are ready to guide you through this important process with online sessions anywhere in California or in-person sessions at our office in Danville, California.
Five Tips for Newly Married Couples
Tip #1
Expect and Accept Conflict. Conflict is actually an important part of a relationship. Working through tension and disagreements is how we build trust and safety and create a lasting bond. Conflict is not the problem in a relationship, it is conflict that is avoided, unresolved or hurtful that impacts a relationship negatively.
Tip #2
Time apart is just as important as time together. Think of your relationship as a ven diagram – you are each a circle and those circles should be somewhat overlapped, but not completely overlapped. Your individual space and time creates fresh air in the relationship, whereas relationships that are too enmeshed can start to feel suffocating and restricting.
Tip #3
Be aware of what you each bring into the relationship. Everyone comes into a relationship with some life experience and whether you realize it or not, that experience plays a part in your relationship. The most useful tool is self-awareness to help you understand your triggers, learned family dynamics and past wounds. This awareness helps you feel more able to be responsive versus reactive.
Tip #4
Know your attachment style. Understanding your attachment style has become more mainstream recently and is very helpful in understanding how you view relationships. To get more insight you can follow TheSecureRelationship on instagram or visit here to take a quiz to learn more.
Tip #5
Remember it is quality, not quantity. After the wedding, couples settle into day-to-day life and for most it gets challenging to balance busy lives and prioritizing the relationship. However the quality of your time together, feeling the other is present and interested, is much more important than the actual amount of time you are together. Remembering that can take some of the pressure off of trying to balance it all.
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