Emotionally Focused Couples Therapy
If you are struggling in your relationship, there is help... and hope!
Are you and your partner stuck in repetitive negative patterns, making communication impossible?
Do you feel stuck in difficult interactions with your partner with no clear way out? Are you feeling frustrated and even scared that your relationship could end? Does this poor communication loop leave you feeling sad, lonely and disconnected? Is relationship stress impacting other areas of your life?
Experiencing communication blocks with your partner is distressing and are not something that self-help books, advice from friends or using “I” statements can easily fix. Many couples struggle unnecessarily, hoping their problems will just go away, inadvertently increasing disconnection and underlying anger and resentment.
Learning to communicate and understand each other in a new way is key to having a relationship that feels connected, intimate and trusting. Fortunately, Emotionally Focused Couples Therapy gives us a proven method for resolving stuck places and creating a stronger connection.
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You are not alone! Most couples get caught in a negative cycle.
Statistics show that half of all couples attend counseling at some point in their relationship, with the vast majority finding it very helpful. In Emotionally Focused Couples Therapy, more than two-thirds of participants report moving from distressed to connection, with lasting change.
Seeking support shows that your commitment to your relationship is strong. Too often, relationships end up on the back burner due to juggling hectic jobs, full schedules and lots of family responsibilities. Life is busy, but neglecting your relationship is a choice many come to regret. Too many couples wait until they are in crisis to get support, only increasing the amount of work needed.
The good news is our therapists have helped hundreds of couples improve and repair their relationship. Let’s make the time to strengthen your relationship, rather than moving through busy days with negative interactions, unresolved conflict and hurt feelings.
There is a way to create the healthy, happy relationship you want
In Emotionally Focused Couples Therapy (EFCT), we work together to clearly identify the cycle you and your partner are caught in. Typically we find two or three key stuck places that are responsible for most negative interactions.
This new clarity around your stuck places, allow us to create a plan to shift out of them. In the process you begin to understand each other in new ways. This deeper understanding plants the seeds for increased connection.
With a new, softer view of yourself and your partner, communication is more consistent and predictable, conflict resolution tools are easier to use and a stronger bond is created.
All therapists at Renewed Relationships Counseling Group are fully trained in EFCT. Our owner, Stephanie Saari, LMFT is a Certified Emotionally Focused Therapist and Supervisor, meaning that she is one of the most highly trained EFCT therapists in California.
Imagine These Changes in Your Relationship
Imagine not worrying each day that conflict may spring up at anytime and instead viewing your relationship as a place for support and stress relief. If you are willing to make your relationship a priority, we have the tools to help you make these changes.
These are not lofty dreams, they are goals that we have helped hundreds of couples reach!
Feeling heard, understood, and truly valued by each other
Experiencing a deeper sense of connection and closeness
Enjoying greater intimacy and strengthening your bond
Why Emotionally Focused Couples Therapy is Worth It
Feeling hesitant or nervous to start couples therapy is very common, but avoiding it is not the answer. Many couples mistakenly believe that their issues can be resolved through casual conversations or simply “letting things go.” However, poor communication, unresolved conflicts and emotional distance only fester, leading to deeper resentment and a weakened relationship.
One common misconception is that couples therapy is only for relationships on the brink of collapse. In reality, it can benefit couples at all stages, from newlyweds to long-term partners. Early intervention can prevent small problems from escalating into significant issues. By seeking therapy proactively, you can enhance your relationship’s resilience and foster a deeper connection.
Fear of judgment or stigma can also deter couples from seeking help. However, a skilled therapist creates a non-judgmental environment where you can openly express your feelings and concerns. By sharing your experiences, you can gain valuable insights into your own patterns of behavior and learn healthier ways of interacting with your partner.
Another common concern is the cost of therapy. While it may seem like an added expense, it is an investment in the most important thing in your life with significant long-term benefits. A stronger relationship leads to increased happiness, improved overall well-being, and even increased financial stability.
Some worry that couples therapy might make things worse. While it might feel hard to talk about stuck places and uncomfortable feelings, that is the path to making things better, not worse! Leaving unhealthy dynamics and underlying feelings in place and unaddressed is what makes things worse in a relationship.
Remember, seeking help is a sign of strength, not weakness. By choosing to invest in your relationship, you’re taking a proactive step towards a happier and more fulfilling future together. Don’t let fear or hesitation prevent you from accessing the support and guidance you deserve.
What Is Emotionally Focused Couples Therapy (EFCT)?
EFCT is a structured approach to couples therapy developed by Dr. Sue Johnson in the 1980’s. There has been significant empirical research that shows that 70-75% of couples move from distress to recovery and approximately 90% show significant improvement. For more information on these studies, you can visit www.iceeft.org.
EFCT earned the American Psychological Association (APA) gold standard as the most effective evidenced based couples therapy approach currently in the field.
A key focus of EFCT is on understanding emotions and how we manage and express them. By working with the deeper piece of learning strategies for dealing with emotions more effectively, EFCT creates lasting change and healthier more fulfilling relationships.
PERCENT of couples move from distress to recovery
PERCENT of couples show significant improvement
Emotionally Focused Therapy gives couples a road map to follow for the therapeutic process. Together we move through 3 stages of work including:
Stage One
Identifying and de-escalating your cycle of conflict. You will understand exactly where and how you get stuck, allowing you to change course before getting caught in the cycle. Communication is slower and softer with each other and begins to create more trust that conflict can be avoided.
Stage Two
Reconstructing and deepening your bond by seeing each other and yourself in a new way. As we piece together the cycle, you get a new and deeper understanding of each other, this creates a more positive view of your partner and your relationship, which lowers defenses and increases connection.
Stage Three
Consolidating a new cycle in which you both feel heard, understood, and valued and secure in your relationship. We apply your new communication techniques to any residual hurt places or resentments, healing old wounds and increasing confidence in your relationship and each other.
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