If you are struggling in your relationship, there is help….and hope!
Does it feel impossible to communicate with your partner?
Most couples get caught in a cycle of conflict that they repeat over and over again, about big things and little things.
Getting continuously stuck in this cycle takes a toll on your relationship, causing frustration, disconnection and fear that your relationship could end.
Your relationship should not be this difficult.
You are a team and want to feel loved and valued by each other. So, let’s get to work shifting this cycle instead of staying stuck in it.
Too many couples wait until their cycle of conflict has reached a crisis point before seeking marriage counseling. This delay only further damages your relationship with built up anger, resentment and lack of trust.
There is a way to create the healthy, happy relationship you want.
Through online couples counseling, we work together to identify the cycle you and your partner are caught in and find new ways to understand each other and communicate. This process creates increased connection and intimacy and reduces conflict.
I work with couples using Emotionally Focused Therapy, the most successful and sought-after type of couple
- Communicating well and arguing less
- Feeling heard, understood and valued
- Being more connected
- Enjoying more intimacy
These are not lofty dreams, they are goals that I have helped hundreds of couples reach and are absolutely possible for you, if you are willing to make your relationship a priority.
What Is Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT)?
EFT is a structured approach to couples therapy developed by Dr. Sue Johnson in the 1980’s. There has been significant empirical research that shows that 70-75% of couples move from distress to recovery and approximately 90% show significant improvement. For more information on these studies, you can visit www.iceeft.org.
Emotionally Focused Therapy earned the American Psychological Association (APA) gold standard as the most effective evidenced based couples therapy approach currently in the field.
As an EFT therapist I continually hone my skills in couples therapy with rigorous study, trainings and supervision. I guide my couples through a transformative experience that helps them identify their negative cycle and move from conflict to connection and happiness.
Emotionally Focused Therapy gives couples a road map to follow for the therapeutic process. Together we move through 3 stages of work including:
- Identifying and de-escalating your cycle of conflict
- Restructuring and deepening your bond by seeing each other and yourself in a new way
- Consolidating a new cycle in which you both feel heard, understood and valued in your communication and secure in your relationship
Five Tips for Successful Couples Therapy
- You get out of it, what you put into it. Attending sessions on a weekly basis and being open to listening to your partner and expressing yourself are key to success.
- What happens in the session, stays in the session. An important part of therapy is talking about hard, challenging subjects. The therapy room should be a safe space to do that, without fear that you or your partner will punish each other after the session is over.
- Slow and steady wins the race. Understandably, we want our problems fixed immediately, however therapy is a process. While some immediate relief can be experienced, there are also times that are very uncomfortable and hard. Being patient and allowing the time that is needed for deeper change is important.
- Our history impacts our present. While much of couples therapy is spent exploring the current dynamics of your relationship. Some time is also spent exploring each of your individual backgrounds. Our family and old relationships greatly influence our present relationships, and working through those can be very helpful.
- Be open with your therapist about how therapy is going. Change often occurs when we are uncomfortable, because that is when we are doing something different. However, feeling uncomfortable often makes us want to flee. Sharing those thoughts and feelings with your therapist is so important, and could lead to a breakthrough.
What to Expect
The first step in getting the life you want is asking for help. I know that can feel hard, but it might be good to know that most people feel a sense of relief after their first session and are much more comfortable than they expected.
Once you contact me, we will set up a 20-minute phone consultation so that I can ensure I am a fit for your needs, answer any questions you have, and get you all set on my schedule if we decide to work together.
I will then send you a link to fill out my private practice forms online prior to your appointment. You will have an online portal to manage your schedule, billing and securely communicate with me.
Then, plan to meet weekly for your 50-minute online session. Consistency in attending sessions is the most important factor in making steady progress in your therapy process.